Saying “No” is the biggest challenge all of us face whether at the work place or at home. If you are a career woman, the chances are you are either highly overworked at both home and office or guilt ridden for always missing that meeting or worrying at all the home chores you left behind.
How that “No” is communicated makes a world of difference. In workplace, the context and the tone and tenor is an important subtext. The following tips may come in handy in a tricky situation at workplace.
Don’t natter: When communicating on your decision, its important to stay on topic. Don’t wander away from the subject at hand nor elapse into a nervy ramble. Have the discussion (which might be lengthy) but be clear and honest about your reasons. For it to be well received, make sure you prepare in advance of that conversation, your motivations as well as the reasons as to your “No”. Avoid making that either a firm “no” or a timid “No” but just something delivered in an even tenor.
Delivery: It is also extremely important that you leave no room for doubt in the minds of the recipient as to your decision. Don’t leave the impression that you might just be convinced with the right words nor that you are a stubborn person who brooks no argument. While its important to communicate well as to the background and the context, it’s not necessary that you need to address every tiny point against that’s raised by your recipient. Be clear, be upright and more importantly be convinced yourself as to your reasons and your decision.
Finally, while it might be extremely difficult for have such conversations with your boss or senior colleague, most people in general appreciate candor in a thoughtful conversation/discussion if communicated in the right way. Make sure though that you make these decisions after careful consideration and communicate them without burning bridges or ruining work relationships.
The key is to practice these conversations, rehearse and re-rehearse before delivery.
This is such an honest piece Lav with practical advice on a topic we women often shy away from – we either take up too much or are forever riddled with guilt for not doing enough
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I know Aks. Sometimes, it’s ok to say the word.
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One only needs to be 100% convinced about ones stand, specially when it is a “NO”.
A reflective post Lavanya! Look forward to more such…
Anagha recently posted… Motherhood Stories
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So true, gurlie. Thanks for stopping by and the comment!
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Yes Lavanya, we all face this situation day in and day out. Many times we miss out the good opportunities and regret for not able to take the right call and say ‘no’, and we also repeat the mistake. It is because it is not an easy process as it appears to, what is there to just say no but the context and courage goes missing, and we divert in the conversation and topic get diluted. Therefore as aptly stated it is an art, learning the art comes through planning and preparation.
By the way you have lovely blog and I will be soon going through your books, congrats for your good work and publication that needs quality effort and the short stories which I love to read.
😀
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Hey Nihar, your comments are spot on. Instead of seizing the moment Many live with perpetual regrets. Thanks for stopping by and so glad you like my writing.
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Well said Lavanya, life is so much in the present we keep harping on the past and live in the hope of future…
😀
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We are too ingrained with saying yes all the times. But saying No becomes easy when you practice.
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Not easy even when you practice! But we ought to keep up.
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